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Dear Caroline,

Happy Valentine’s Day, my love. I wish I were with you.

I miss your lips against mine. I miss the way your lips are always willing to part for mine. The way your mouth is always so warm, so willing, so wet. I know your mouth better than I know my own. My only regret from my trip to see you last week is that I didn’t kiss you more. That I didn’t spend every available second with my hands in yours, my mouth on yours.

The time together was exactly what we needed. The time to reaffirm everything we’ve talked about for months. To slide back into our roles together and to find that we are still a perfect fit.

Now we face a different challenge. We had gotten accustomed to our schedule of talking despite our opposite shifts. We were used to missing each other. But we spent that time together and now we must start all over. We have to re-learn how to cope with the distance.

But we face other challenges as well. Some I can help with. One I cannot.

Here’s a unique perspective for you: If you love me so much that it doesn’t matter what we do together, doesn’t it stand to reason that any job you take won’t suck simply because you’ll come home to me? I won’t let you take some job that makes you miserable or keeps you bored. We’ll do whatever we have to to keep it interesting. When I say that I don’t want you to ever be bored with me, I mean every facet of your life. I don’t ever want you to settle. I want to encourage you to grow.

We’ve learned we can handle the distance. If this job or something similar keeps you away for two more years, we’ll just figure out a visitation schedule. One three day weekend every third month. Whatever it takes. The time after won’t feel nearly as hopeless if we know we’ll do it again.

And here’s a secret: If you love Florida so much, I’ll start making plans to move there with you, if that’s what you want. I got my licenses and took a job that I can move anywhere. And I did it on purpose. If you decide you love it there and want to stay, all you have to do is ask and I’ll be there. I’ll make it work.

The last challenge is the hardest because I cannot help you. I can’t tell you what to do or say or how to make it easier. I can ask for your permission to step in and explain myself, but I know you don’t want that. All I can say is that I trust you. I’m right here for whatever you need, even if that need is for me to do nothing.

I love you so much, babycakes. I mean it when I say that you are my everything.

Love,
Stacy

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